8 lbs. vs the Whopper

Today in class two students who have been part of the Fill Your Cup tribe from inception were talking about a weight loss goal. One woman said, in the next 6 weeks she wanted to lose 8 lbs and so she got diet pills so she could still eat fast food cheeseburgers. The other replied, “You know you get one or the other, 8 lbs off or the whopper.”

It was so simple and clear and we all laughed at the obvious conclusion. You get thin or you get full, not both. So which one matters more?

The next element to the morning that made me smile is the tribe itself.  Your community can help support your cause.  Think about your family, friends, the classes you take – do they inspire a light living life? What would YOUR friends say in a similar situation? Are they going to tell you want is comfortable to hear, everyone deserves a Whopper sometimes hunnie or will they tell you the truth? 8 lbs vs. whopper – you decides who wins.

(PS it’s worth mentioning eventually, you will feel satisfied and satiated eating less – give yourself a month to adjust.)

Naturally Skinny is really a matter of perspective.

As soon as I typed that I knew there would be mis-understandings by the Oprah contingency saying, “Yup, that’s right, skinny is whenever you feel good in your own skin.” I don’t think that’s the real problem with Americans today. I was just at the Water Park and lots of people are feeling way too comfortable in their own skin. It’s absurd the parts spilling out of swimwear this time of year. Some self-awareness and a full-length mirror would go along way to the cure for diabetes.

Naturally skinny people have a different perspective about food than naturally heavy people. Skinny people eat whatever they want, and they feel like they eat a lot. But what they really want to eat is totally different than what naturally heavy people want to eat. Where skinny people gloat at how much they eat (and I’ve watched and journal them it’s not that much food over a week’s time) heavy people feel deprived when they don’t get to gorge themselves.

What and how much food you want to consume, that is your appetite. Yes, eating too many calories makes you fat. And wanting too many calories keeps you fat. For a while you can discipline yourself into a diet plan that constricts your meals to certain foods and meal frequencies but why you want so many calories, Appetite is what you are left with long after your enthusiasm for your fad diet has worn off.

Fill Your Cup is a weight loss book and lifestyle www.fill-your-cup.com Contact Jp@fill-your-cup.com to buy the book and for coaching.

Start Tuesday!

An on and off Fill Your Cup follower (sound familiar) told me once she has to start eating lighter on Mondays and if she has a “bad” meal or day then she has to wait until the next Monday to get motivated.

Has anyone else thought that way? I asked her, does fat know the days of the week? Do Calories? Then why is the day a condition for your mind? Just start now in the middle of the day, wait and wait and wait until you are really hungry and then eat something cup size, stay somewhat hungry and then notice when your mind just stops it’s incessant whining and you can eat a cup of something delicious and nutritious 3 times a day. For most over eater’s eating is a lot more about habit than necessity. Overcome your resistance and start right now.

“It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.” – Leonardo da Vinci

About weight loss books

It’s a cold drizzly day in Park City and I’m browsing through my significant other’s bookshelf where he has several “weight loss lifestyle books.” Before we started dating Andy (that’s his name) had been trying to lose some weight.

Andy’s books are similar to ones I have read before. There is a section on inspiration, some rules of diet, and trends in nutrition followed by an exercise section of at home fitness routines that remind me of primary school PE class. Then there’s the grid of what you must do each day, how many servings you must eat and what you must stock in your pantry.

The whole thing makes me want to rebel and bite into a snickers bar and I’m not all that triggered or emotional about weight loss. I’m happy in my body. I can’t imagine how these books affect someone who is searching. Most weight loss approaches, just like these books’, are dogmatic and didactic. I kind of want to do something totally opposite just to prove I can live like I want and be thin. The truth is that no plan is absolute. There is not a one and only solution to permanent weight loss. No one size fits all. Sorry.

The only rule I can commit to is if you don’t make the path of your own volition it will never stick for the long term. I had a student say, “I can contain my portions and eat 1200 calories a day and look great for a while but its not sustainable for me.” I explained to her “That is because you never really got a grip on your own appetite. When you are clear about what, why and how you feed yourself you can sustain the body you want.” I had a magazine interview me about the best exercise for weight loss. They were disappointed when I answered, “Whatever you like – because I can’t come to your house at 6 am and tie your tennis shoes.”

Wouldn’t it be fantastic to get to a place of acceptance where the calories you want matched the image you like to see of yourself? Yes that can absolutely happen, but only if it’s your own plan. No one can do it for you. I can coach you and ask questions to guide, but you have to answer those questions and commit to yourself. Fill Your Cup.

Plato and Steve finding the good life

In order for someone to find the good life or ideal state, it is crucial according to Plato that the 3 aspects of the soul are balanced.

Reason – your intellect that craves truth
Spirit – your will and personal choice that craves honor
Appetite – your desire and passion that crave matters of the world (sex, food, shelter, money, in no particular order.)

This seems to line up easily with the Fill Your Cup weight loss system.

Reason: cup size portions.
Spirit: move every day and have a community of people on your side
Appetite: what are you hungry for, do you know why? Check it with reason and fill your cup!

A student of mine was diagnosed with serious prostate cancer. He is an optimist, has remarkable will and soul alignment. He asked me to train him in Pilates deep core work every day prior to surgery this month.

Steve’s Cup:

Reason: He is meeting with the best doctors he can find, eating a vegan diet advised by a naturopath
Spirit: He has a huge network of friends, family and coaches who believe in him and all that is possible preparing him for surgery.
Appetite: He has radically changed his diet and said that in a week the vegan fresh organic life foods are all that he craves.

He’s beating odds daily. He’s armed with cutting edge brain research, absolute faith and in my opinion a harmonious soul that Plato would applaud.

What would you do if aligning your soul and caring for your body the best you could were a matter of life and death?

New Year’s Cup

So many people have body goals this time of year. Students will agonize with points and plans with cutting foods and buying special ingredients commanding themselves to exercise extreme discipline. It’s outside their normal life and that’s what it takes to change shape.

I’d like to offer a thought for my students who are especially body aware right now:

To my student who is frail: FILL (yes fill to the brim) your cup three times a day. Choose your most generous choices, meat avocados, rich nuts, vegetables, and fruits. You will feel different, you wont get thick but you will feel stronger and energetic.

To my student who is thick: Fill (just to take off the edgy of hunger) your cup only three times a day. Choose rigorous fibrous vegetables or fruit, and lean meat, you will be hungry but, you won’t be frail and you will feel more agile and light.

To the student who is anxious about life: Fill your cup three times a day. Each time thoughtfully pause and be inspired in your hunger to make the choices that suit your life’s demands.

Everyone deserves to fill his or her life well, as Plato suggests in harmony with reason, passion and appetite. Stay tuned, tweet what you eat and always fill your cup!

It’s not Fair!!

Summer Vacations provides those of us with spawn (as my cousin refers to my sons) more parenting opportunities than during the school year. We travel together, vacation together, eat more meals together, our easier schedules provide much, togetherness. A classic childhood complaint I’ve heard a lot this summer is “It’s not fair!?!” I tell my guys in response to that grievance, “Nope it’s not. So why do you keep expecting it to BE fair?”

When we struggle with our weight we have similar protests. These protests are often unspoken voices in our heads; they illuminate our maturity issue with food. What we want to be true isn’t and, wait for it…. “That’s not fair.”

OK, so why do we expect fairness after all these years of proof that life isn’t? That size 4 woman who orders onion rings and eats all of her burger even the bun, what’s the deal? You’ve got it – It’s not fair!? The skinny guy at work who laments “I make whole milk milkshakes every day and I just cant put on a pound.” Again, NOT fair?! Perhaps not. If you’ve wanted to be thinner, you’ve run into those unfair stories and rolled your eyes wondering what happened to your metabolism inheritance, move on past those questions.

I have no idea why some people have to workout more and eat considerably less but does it matter? What you really want is a shift between where you are today and where you want to be. Right? That will likely mean spending more time creating lean muscles on your body and less time eating, especially things that are delicious and abundant in the summer time like ice cream cones and umbrella drinks.

It is not fair. Don’t expect it to be. Live your life making the best choices you can! Fill Your Cup.

HCG Diet

A woman came up to me after class last weekend and asked about the HCG Diet and if I thought it was healthy. I said, “I’m not a doctor so I don’t advise on health, but what do you want it to do for you?” She said, “Well, make me thin, just the last 15 lbs or so.” She was young, beautiful, voluptuous and had a dazzling smile. I said, “for how long?” She said, “Forever, because after I loose the weight I can keep it off.” I raised my eyebrows and exclaimed, “Really how?!” And she replied “by eating right and exercising.” I nodded, “And if you could actually do that, would you need the HCG?”

I explained, as I have hundreds of times before, that to be thin you have to be very mature about your diet. You have to develop enough self control to eat less than you want to all of the time for a month and still eat less than you want to on holidays, vacations, and birthdays forever. It isn’t easy but to me, it’s worth it.

I don’t know if HCG will really harm anyone but, I do know that if you aren’t willing to bite the bullet and practice the maturity and discipline because it is important to you, well, you aren’t going to do it in 6 months, either just because you are thin by medicine.

The only way to have good habits 6 months from now is to practice them today, in your natural, stressful, unpredictable, spontaneous, tempting life. If you want a temporary state of thin-ness for a class reunion, photo shoot or an event then, HCG is the luxury and risk you take. Don’t kid yourself that you have changed on the inside because for a few months you’re wearing skinny jeans.

Go back to the last post and sort out who you really are inside, and what THAT is worth. I coach people to practice eating less and to create new habits so in a few months they only need me for a check up. With Fill Your Cup your life is yours. It is yours to enjoy, honor and be responsible for. Contact me for private instruction and rates. jp@fill-your-cup.com

Learn to Fill Your Cup from the inside out.

“If merely ‘feeling good’ could decide, drunkenness would be the supremely valid human experience.” – William James

Sometimes when we’re just about to step up to the next level in our life path there’s a pretty lousy moment.

I don’t advocate incessant misery, as you well know, I believe in filling our cup (that means our dinner plate or the cup of our soul) with what makes us feel most alive and true! Nothing mediocre, ordinary or disingenuous, I would rather be empty than filled with something that compromises my code, of having an extraordinary life.

If you are true to yourself (review the last post about integrity) the emptiness is comforting. You are making space for the new you, so stop dwelling on the anxiety of it all and remember what your goals are, what your code is and what you are really about. It may not ‘feel good’ all the time but when you step up, in line with your values and dreams you will – feel sensational!


Integrity is the strict adherence to a code. It implies attempted consistency of your actions in relationship to your values, expectations and outcomes. A basis for integrity may be a moral code, a spiritual code; I’d even be willing to argue that your diet is a code about your own nutrition.

The base assumption with integrity is that you have first bothered to spend some time to figure out your code. You can’t have integrity if you have no code. How can you to measure consistency in operating to something you’ve never taken the time to define?

What is your code with regard to food? Maybe you never eat fast food except on Vacation, or you always have something green with lunch or you never eat between meals or…What are your standards/code/rules/values about food? No don’t reach for Dr. Adkins, French Women, Skinny Bitch or even Fill Your Cup to define your beliefs about food just yet. Spend a quiet moment. And answer these 3 questions: What is your code? Are you operating your daily life with integrity to it? How well do the code and/or your level of integrity match up with your goals?